Duh! Lightbulb!

I hadn't realized I needed to learn so many lessons in the last few years...and I'm afraid, the lessons are not over.


So, three years ago I took the risk of changing teaching positions, primarily to save myself from a grim situation although I left behind some of the most remarkable colleagues and friends. As my new position continued to become smaller and smaller until it disappeared, I had to adjust and modify my previous plans.


Plans, as no one would argue, are necessary in life, at least for most of us (there are those who seemingly wander through life WITHOUT a plan and do just fine and I am envious of that kind of faith). However, as anyone over the age of 21 would attest, life just seems to have different plans for us, different lessons to learn, etc...


There are those if us who will take these changes and turn with the tide so as not to drown. Then there are those of us who get so fragmented with what was lost that recovery is a terrible potential battle. I am not sure where I am going with this because I sat down to write about lefse but oh well, that's my brain these days.


I think I am of the more "go with the flow" type - at least on most days. And there are days like today.


ANYWAY, as I am baking lefse for tonight's final class/celebration, I am battling the first real cold (as opposed to minor sniffles from autumn allergens), as is the rest of my family. Not only am I feeling the cold, I actually think there might be a few flu viruses thrown in there for good measure I am a chilled and hot, chilled and hot...anyway point is, I don't feel swell. Which brings me to my original thought as I watch the lefse bake on my beautiful lefse griddle, I am being paid by the hour now. What I am USED TO is being on salary - in fact, I have had a yearly salary since before my kids were born - and now I am back here, in this position of keeping track of my hours so I can snag any semblance of a paycheck to add to the  V E R Y tight household budget.


**Side note: I just crumpled a piece of lefse dough because I didn't keep it cool, which I know better....and now I ruined a piece! Dummy.


So, as I am finishing the last part of lefse prep, I am thoughtful in how I am where I am right now. Not finished with school, not getting any leads on more permanent, full time teaching gigs, and only working part time which is not terribly helpful when trying to make a tight budget work. (Insert frustration and increased blood pressure). Then I remind myself to have faith in my decisions and to learn at each step along this journey what is and is not important. A slim Christmas is definitely ok. Our health and happiness is even better. The love I have for my family and how we will celebrate the Holidays together because life is short and precious and my beautiful girls are growing up so damn fast - that is the lesson to be learned. Over and over and over...



Oops...

This is not what I had intended....when I started back up, I wanted to be a regular contributor to my own blog...and here it is a month freakin' later and there is nary a word between.


The thing is, on my drive to and from Red Wing (and most closely related to my teaching observations), I have really great posts "created in my brain"...then I walk in my door and whether or not Mark is home and not on the road, I turn back into Mom. So, mind-blog is gone...


The other thing is that my observations come so quickly that I get on overload and can't stay focused. I think there is a computer-based tool that would let me just talk my way through my brain and it would spit it out onto the computer. That is what I need. A very efficient method of focusing my thoughts.


Of thoughts I have had recently, if you haven't read Water for Elephants, please go immediately to your nearest library or bookstore and get that book. I just took (a little luxury) the time to watch the movie version of this great book, and although movies nearly always pale in comparison, I really enjoyed the film version of this story. It's been awhile since I read the book but it all came back to me as the movie progressed. Just a great little story. Not to be missed.


And with that, I need to prep for my evening at work,. We are testing tonight (and hopefully will be able to show that our learners have progressed in their English acquisition). Even more importantly is the relationship we've built with these wonderful people. One of my (four) jobs now is to create a program for Spanish speakers to earn their American GED. We have a number of candidates for this degree and it would be terrific to have an efficient and relevant program for them.


My husband is going to be bringing home a little late lunch for us in a bit - I really enjoy seeing him during unexpected times during the day. Reminds me of when we were (a lot) younger! He's still a cutie!